10 Things I’ve Learned about Vamps and Weres from Watching True Blood

July 20, 2010 by  

Vampires and Werewolves are such interesting creatures, aren’t they?  From my observations of these two supernatural species on True Blood I’ve learned so much about their habits, behavior and culture.  Here’s some of what I’ve learned:

1. Werewolves enjoy a good howl. (And probably a good scratch behind the ears, too.)

2. Vampires enjoy a good smoke. (As long as it’s a cigar and not a woman. Huh?)

3. Werewolves have lousy fashion sense. (Understandable, I guess, if you’re always ripping your clothes off.)

4. Vampires have great fashion sense. (Though when they have the time to clothes-shop, I have no idea. Perhaps that’s what minions are for.)

5. Werewolves like to watch lame game shows like Let’s Make a Deal. (Obviously Jeopardy is too cerebral. I bet Vampires are ace at Jeopardy.)

6. Vampires are extremely messy eaters. (Ever heard of a napkin, guys!? At least werewolves have an excuse: they have no hands!)

7. Werewolves don’t do housework. (Or even decorate, apparently.)

8. Vampires don’t do housework. (Vampires will make a mess all over your carpet and expect that if they smile prettily at you, you’ll to clean it up for them. See, above, about minions.)

9. Werewolves can’t hold their V. (When they get high they tend to prance around like serial-killer schoolgirls.)

10. Vampires can hold a grudge – for an inordinately long period of time. (Oh dear Russell, you are so for it!)

So what have you learned?